Not All Who Wander Are Lost

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"You are enough. Paint it on your mirrors, on the back of your eyelids, drown it in your stomach, sing it in every word you say. You are never too much. Eat your food, sleep eight hours, walk like you love yourself. You are enough. Say it in your sleep, mantras to carry you through your day. There is never enough of you. You are a thirst that is never quenched. I crave you when you’re away. I love every piece of you. But I cannot make you love yourself."

- Michelle K., You Are Enough. (via fashinpirate)

(Source: michellekpoems, via whimsical-nostalgia)

14th December, 52 : 13, Saturday

(Source: mymirrormyswordandshield)

"Ce ne sont pas les hivers qui sont trop longs, ce sont vos coeurs qui sont trop froids."

- (via ademain)

(via siriusc)

"Imagination doesn’t just mean making things up. It means thinking things through, solving them, or hoping to do so, and being just distant enough to be able to laugh at things that are normally painful. Head teachers would call this escapism, but they would be entirely wrong. I would call fantasy the most serious, and the most useful, branch of writing there is. And this is why I don’t, and never would, write Real Books."

- Diana Wynne Jones, Reflections: On the Magic of Writing

At the moment I’m reading one of the many books of the Chrestomanci series and really, I can’t seem to stop laughing. Conrad’s Fate is one of the rare books which tell a good story, are exciting and full of well developed characters while still being extremely funny. I know it’s a book originally intended for children but - to be honest - I always thought that really good children’s books can be read and enjoyed by adults too. I mean - why not?
10th October, 00 : 18, Thursday

At the moment I’m reading one of the many books of the Chrestomanci series and really, I can’t seem to stop laughing. Conrad’s Fate is one of the rare books which tell a good story, are exciting and full of well developed characters while still being extremely funny. I know it’s a book originally intended for children but - to be honest - I always thought that really good children’s books can be read and enjoyed by adults too. I mean - why not?

"It seems to me that the years between eighteen and twenty-eight are the hardest, psychologically. It’s then you realize this is make or break, you no longer have the excuse of youth, and it is time to become an adult – but you are not ready."

- Helen Mirren
In the Frame: My Life in Words and Pictures (via suhos)

(Source: omybestbeloved, via whimsical-nostalgia)

"Ich sehe einen Verstand, scharf wie hundert Messer, und einen Willen, hart wie ein Schlachtblock. Eine Seele sehe ich nicht."

- S. 172, Amila in Spieltrieb, by Juli Zeh

One of the central topics of Stalins Kühe is the bulimia Anna is suffering from but despite the illness domination Anna’s life more and more (she refers to it as her “Lord whom she serves”) the book doesn’t just focus on weight gain and loss, calories or purging. In Stalins Kühe Anna’s bulimia is symptomatic for a lot of hidden problems - you could say that it isn’t just Anna who is ill but the whole system. She even indicates in the book that she never learnt how to control her eating behavior because she’s in a way living between two worlds: On the one side there is Finnland and on the other side there is Estland. In Estland everything is cheaper so when Anna visits the home country of her mother she can buy lots and lots of sweets, clothes etc. She even behaves differently and that feeling of living in two different worlds, of being ashamed of her own origin (she never tells anybody that her mother is from Estland) while loving Estland at the same time contributes a big deal to her eating disorder.
17th April, 57 : 15, Wednesday

One of the central topics of Stalins Kühe is the bulimia Anna is suffering from but despite the illness domination Anna’s life more and more (she refers to it as her “Lord whom she serves”) the book doesn’t just focus on weight gain and loss, calories or purging. In Stalins Kühe Anna’s bulimia is symptomatic for a lot of hidden problems - you could say that it isn’t just Anna who is ill but the whole system. She even indicates in the book that she never learnt how to control her eating behavior because she’s in a way living between two worlds: On the one side there is Finnland and on the other side there is Estland. In Estland everything is cheaper so when Anna visits the home country of her mother she can buy lots and lots of sweets, clothes etc. She even behaves differently and that feeling of living in two different worlds, of being ashamed of her own origin (she never tells anybody that her mother is from Estland) while loving Estland at the same time contributes a big deal to her eating disorder.

I started a new book. It’s from the same author as Fegefeuer, which I’ve finished recently. Stalins Kühe deals with similar topics as Fegefeuer (World War II, Estland, East/West, Communism/ Capitalism) but I like the protagonist (Anna) much better as Aliide.
17th April, 08 : 15, Wednesday

I started a new book. It’s from the same author as Fegefeuer, which I’ve finished recently. Stalins Kühe deals with similar topics as Fegefeuer (World War II, Estland, East/West, Communism/ Capitalism) but I like the protagonist (Anna) much better as Aliide.

"Ich war mir immer ganz sicher gewesen, dass aus mir niemals eine solche KZ-Prinzessin würde, in deren Innerem ein Hungertod stattfindet, aus der aber auf die Wimpern geklebte kleine Diamanten ein Star machen. Von dem nicht einmal ein schöner Körper übrig bleiben würde."

- S. 179, Stalins Kühe, Sofi Oksanen

I started to read Fegefeuer(eng. Version Purge) again. I always hated the big mean looking fly on the cover (it’s just not something I want to look at for hours :) ) but the story is quite fascinating. To sum it up: It’s about women and what they do to survive and to reach their goals. (Especially Aliide has an absolutely ruthless side … ) I’m feeling a bit ambiguous when it comes to the characters … On the one side their portrayed in a very realistic, detailed and direct way (Oksanen doesn’t sugarcoat anything) but on the other side it’s hard to connect with Aliide or Zara because their bitterness and desperation is portrayed in an almost gross way (there is clearly a parallel to the fly on the cover). Of course there isn’t anything wrong with showing the reader these emotions but the somehow clinical and cold way it is done creates a distance between the characters and the reader which is hard to overcome. This doesn’t have to be viewed as a negative point - it’s more a matter of preference - and one is certain: Sofi Oksanen is a great storyteller!
12th April, 24 : 13, Friday

I started to read Fegefeuer(eng. Version Purge) again. I always hated the big mean looking fly on the cover (it’s just not something I want to look at for hours :) ) but the story is quite fascinating. To sum it up: It’s about women and what they do to survive and to reach their goals. (Especially Aliide has an absolutely ruthless side … ) I’m feeling a bit ambiguous when it comes to the characters … On the one side their portrayed in a very realistic, detailed and direct way (Oksanen doesn’t sugarcoat anything) but on the other side it’s hard to connect with Aliide or Zara because their bitterness and desperation is portrayed in an almost gross way (there is clearly a parallel to the fly on the cover). Of course there isn’t anything wrong with showing the reader these emotions but the somehow clinical and cold way it is done creates a distance between the characters and the reader which is hard to overcome. This doesn’t have to be viewed as a negative point - it’s more a matter of preference - and one is certain: Sofi Oksanen is a great storyteller!

"In zwei kleinen rechteckigen Kartons befand sich das Essen vom indischen Imbiss. Elias hatte keinen Hunger, lag apathisch auf dem Sofa, unter einer dünnen Decke, und zappte durch die Kanäle. Ich setzte mich zu ihm und schmiegte mich an ihn. Ich wollte unbedingt seine Wärme spüren, ihn küssen und streicheln, aber er bewegte sich nicht, gestand mir nicht einmal die kleinste Liebkosung zu. Die Leichenstarre hatte bereits eingesetzt."

- S. 255, Der Russe ist einer, der Birken liebt, by Olga Grjasnowa

I’ve just finished reading Der Russe ist einer, der Birken liebt for the second time and I’m still not sure what to make out of this book. On the one side I like the first part of the book quite well (I love how Grjasnowa illustrates Mascha’s character and her feelings with her style of writing) but on the other side I didn’t really get the point of the last part. I mean I got that Mascha was devastated after the sudden and unexpected death of her boyfriend Elischa but was it really necessary to let the reader watch over pages and pages how Mascha tries to destroy herself? And yeah, I didn’t like the end. It was far too open for my taste - I felt that after everything I went through with Mascha I deserved to know what happened to her after her nervous breakdown (if it was a breakdown and not her dying) …
8th April, 19 : 10, Monday

I’ve just finished reading Der Russe ist einer, der Birken liebt 
for the second time and I’m still not sure what to make out of this book. On the one side I like the first part of the book quite well (I love how Grjasnowa illustrates Mascha’s character and her feelings with her style of writing) but on the other side I didn’t really get the point of the last part. I mean I got that Mascha was devastated after the sudden and unexpected death of her boyfriend Elischa but was it really necessary to let the reader watch over pages and pages how Mascha tries to destroy herself? And yeah, I didn’t like the end. It was far too open for my taste - I felt that after everything I went through with Mascha I deserved to know what happened to her after her nervous breakdown (if it was a breakdown and not her dying) …

"Es war klar. Nur einer von uns beiden würde überleben. Und am Ende war ich es. Nicht er."

- 3096 Tage

A few days ago I went to the cinema and watched 3096 Tage witch my German class. At first I had mixed feelings about going because I was really tired and somehow not in the mood for a movie like 3096 Tage but now I’m glad I didn’t miss it. It’s a very moving story and it makes you understand that Natascha Kampusch took a huge risk when she tried to escape eight years after she had been kidnapped. I mean what would have happened to her if she hadn’t been successful? There is no way to know for certain but the movie shows very clearly how difficult it was for her to not be influenced by her kidnappers psychological (and physical) threats. I have to say I really admire her for surviving eight years in captivity without being broken.
15th March, 30 : 08, Friday

A few days ago I went to the cinema and watched 3096 Tage witch my German class. At first I had mixed feelings about going because I was really tired and somehow not in the mood for a movie like 3096 Tage but now I’m glad I didn’t miss it. It’s a very moving story and it makes you understand that Natascha Kampusch took a huge risk when she tried to escape eight years after she had been kidnapped. I mean what would have happened to her if she hadn’t been successful? There is no way to know for certain but the movie shows very clearly how difficult it was for her to not be influenced by her kidnappers psychological (and physical) threats. I have to say I really admire her for surviving eight years in captivity without being broken.

(Source: 3096tage)